you politely ask me not to die and i promise not to
right from the beginning-- a relationship based on
good sense and thoughtfulness in little things
i would like to be loved for such simple attainments
as breathing regularly and not falling down too often
or because my eyes are brown or my father left-handed
and to be on the safe side i wouldn't mind if somehow
i became entangled in your perception of admirable objects
so you might say to yourself: i have recently noticed
how superbly situated the empire state building is
how it looms up suddenly behind cemeteries and rivers
so far away you could touch it-- therefore i love you
part of me fears that some moron is already plotting
to tear down the empire state building and replace it
with a block of staten island mother/daughter houses
just as part of me fears that if you love me for my cleanliness
i will grow filthy if you admire my elegant clothes
i'll start wearing shirts with sailboats on them
but i have decided to become a public beach an opera house
a regularly scheduled flight-- something that can't help being
in the right place at the right time-- come take your seat
we'll raise the curtain fill the house start the engines
fly off into the sunrise, the spire of the empire state
the last sight on the horizon as the earth begins to curve
June 4, 2011
April 8, 2011
a dirge
earlier this week, the SSO filed for chapter 7 bankruptcy.
Syracuse Symphony Orchestra will file for bankruptcy, board announces
I managed to only read one page of the comments before I closed the window. because what is the point.
so, now back to our regularly scheduled garden photos, horse angst, random musings, and occasional opera talk.
Syracuse Symphony Orchestra will file for bankruptcy, board announces
I managed to only read one page of the comments before I closed the window. because what is the point.
so, now back to our regularly scheduled garden photos, horse angst, random musings, and occasional opera talk.
April 5, 2011
rant, part 2, plus more info about the SSO
I've momentarily recovered from my rage-induced blackout and have remembered something I really want to say: part of what makes me so angry is that there are so many people who think the symphony is comprised of a bunch of rich stuffed shirts who snootily believe that classical music is better than anything and that the general public at large should be responsible for paying their exorbitant salaries. except nothing could be further from the truth. the SSO musicians make less than $30K a year. I'm sure most members of the SSO staff make the same, or maybe just a fraction more. they are not buying mansions or big-screen TVs for every room. they are likely working a second job or teaching on the side. they are probably tired a lot.
I resent the mistaken notion that musicians are somehow rich because, once again, I am one of them. and let me tell you something. I might like to garden, but I grow my own food because I have to. I might have incidentally enjoyed mucking stalls for the last three years, but I shoveled that poop because I had to in order to keep my horse. I don't have cable TV, I don't have home internet, I spend ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS A MONTH on groceries. I squeak by. I keep coming to my job at the opera because I love what I do. and because I am surrounded by people who, on most days, love what they do. they are a joy to work with; I have nightmares sometimes that I am leaving them. like the SSO musicians, and like me, my coworkers and colleagues both here and across the country have made a financial sacrifice to do what they love.
I have two bachelor's degrees and a master's degree. there are a lot of other things I could have done with myself. likewise with these musicians, who chose their profession not because they had no other talents but because they so loved to be a part of the orchestra. with the exception of just a handful of orchestras in this country -- cleveland, cincinnati, new york, probably L.A. -- being a symphony musician is a financial sacrifice. but the passion that produces great musicians is not, as so many would like us to believe, a crime.
what has happened in our culture? why are libraries fighting to stay open? why do teachers -- teachers?!?!? -- have to so adamantly fight for every penny they so rightly earn? why do we think that learning isn't important? since when is an institution only worth something culturally if it's for-profit? why are people so mad at the perception that taxpayer money has been wasted on the SSO, and yet aren't mad that huge corporations, who rake in billions -- BILLIONS! with a B! -- of dollars in profits don't have to pay taxes on those profits?
I don't want to get into politics on this blog, although of course all of this is about politics. it's just ... I just don't understand, I really don't. how can we justify the vilification of teachers? how can we pooh-pooh the existence of libraries? how are we possibly supposed to progress as a nation when education is being cut across the board? how can we be proud to have a major league soccer team in portland but not feel the same about the ballet? how can syracuse spend over a decade trying AND FAILING over and over again to create the next fucking mall of america, which is supposedly going to be the crown jewel of the city, and not care about its orchestra? when did our priorities go so far astray?
because you know, there is one other important thing I forgot. as part of the SSO, the SSYO -- the syracuse symphony youth orchestra -- is no more. the kids played their last rehearsal on sunday afternoon. many of them played through tears. my old orchestra director, graduate advisor, boss and friend conducted them. they were rehearsing for a concert in may. the SSYO, like many other youth symphonies, is a top-notch orchestra that kids work very, very hard to get into. there are rigorous auditions and they are expected to know their music just as the adults in the SSO are. for many of these kids, playing in the SSYO is the highlight of their grade school lives. but who cares, right? after all, it's just band camp.
I wish that every person who wrote a jackass derogatory comment on the post-standard's article could just once, just once sit in the middle of a 60+ person orchestra as they are playing the saint-saens organ symphony, as I did as a young twenty-something in college. I wish they could, as I did, watch the violins sawing away and feel the floorboards shaking with the force of sound from the low brass, and grin in sheer, utter, complete and total delight as the organ pipes open and rock the shit out of a concert hall. I wish they could know the elation, as I have, of spending 6 hours a day in a practice room, wood-shedding a section of music, only to finally play it flawlessly in rehearsal. I wish they could feel the overwhelming pride of watching a beloved friend and colleague play her last recital. I wish they could understand how I felt, one day in early 2000, when I sat at a concert in the darkened setnor auditorium and thought, 'if I didn't have this, who would I possibly be?'
More information:
SSO board votes to suspend operations; season canceled, no refunds planned
Final concert for Syracuse Symphony Orchestra?
A swan song for a shortened season: The Syracuse Symphony plays once more, with the future uncertain
Making Music: The work of a Syracuse Symphony Orchestra musician isn't as effortless as it sometimes seems
Diminished: Syracuse without a symphony is hard to contemplate
Symphony shutdown: Young family really wanted to stay in Syracuse
Symphony's collateral damage
it was this darkened concert hall, for the record:
I resent the mistaken notion that musicians are somehow rich because, once again, I am one of them. and let me tell you something. I might like to garden, but I grow my own food because I have to. I might have incidentally enjoyed mucking stalls for the last three years, but I shoveled that poop because I had to in order to keep my horse. I don't have cable TV, I don't have home internet, I spend ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS A MONTH on groceries. I squeak by. I keep coming to my job at the opera because I love what I do. and because I am surrounded by people who, on most days, love what they do. they are a joy to work with; I have nightmares sometimes that I am leaving them. like the SSO musicians, and like me, my coworkers and colleagues both here and across the country have made a financial sacrifice to do what they love.
I have two bachelor's degrees and a master's degree. there are a lot of other things I could have done with myself. likewise with these musicians, who chose their profession not because they had no other talents but because they so loved to be a part of the orchestra. with the exception of just a handful of orchestras in this country -- cleveland, cincinnati, new york, probably L.A. -- being a symphony musician is a financial sacrifice. but the passion that produces great musicians is not, as so many would like us to believe, a crime.
what has happened in our culture? why are libraries fighting to stay open? why do teachers -- teachers?!?!? -- have to so adamantly fight for every penny they so rightly earn? why do we think that learning isn't important? since when is an institution only worth something culturally if it's for-profit? why are people so mad at the perception that taxpayer money has been wasted on the SSO, and yet aren't mad that huge corporations, who rake in billions -- BILLIONS! with a B! -- of dollars in profits don't have to pay taxes on those profits?
I don't want to get into politics on this blog, although of course all of this is about politics. it's just ... I just don't understand, I really don't. how can we justify the vilification of teachers? how can we pooh-pooh the existence of libraries? how are we possibly supposed to progress as a nation when education is being cut across the board? how can we be proud to have a major league soccer team in portland but not feel the same about the ballet? how can syracuse spend over a decade trying AND FAILING over and over again to create the next fucking mall of america, which is supposedly going to be the crown jewel of the city, and not care about its orchestra? when did our priorities go so far astray?
because you know, there is one other important thing I forgot. as part of the SSO, the SSYO -- the syracuse symphony youth orchestra -- is no more. the kids played their last rehearsal on sunday afternoon. many of them played through tears. my old orchestra director, graduate advisor, boss and friend conducted them. they were rehearsing for a concert in may. the SSYO, like many other youth symphonies, is a top-notch orchestra that kids work very, very hard to get into. there are rigorous auditions and they are expected to know their music just as the adults in the SSO are. for many of these kids, playing in the SSYO is the highlight of their grade school lives. but who cares, right? after all, it's just band camp.
I wish that every person who wrote a jackass derogatory comment on the post-standard's article could just once, just once sit in the middle of a 60+ person orchestra as they are playing the saint-saens organ symphony, as I did as a young twenty-something in college. I wish they could, as I did, watch the violins sawing away and feel the floorboards shaking with the force of sound from the low brass, and grin in sheer, utter, complete and total delight as the organ pipes open and rock the shit out of a concert hall. I wish they could know the elation, as I have, of spending 6 hours a day in a practice room, wood-shedding a section of music, only to finally play it flawlessly in rehearsal. I wish they could feel the overwhelming pride of watching a beloved friend and colleague play her last recital. I wish they could understand how I felt, one day in early 2000, when I sat at a concert in the darkened setnor auditorium and thought, 'if I didn't have this, who would I possibly be?'
More information:
SSO board votes to suspend operations; season canceled, no refunds planned
Final concert for Syracuse Symphony Orchestra?
A swan song for a shortened season: The Syracuse Symphony plays once more, with the future uncertain
Making Music: The work of a Syracuse Symphony Orchestra musician isn't as effortless as it sometimes seems
Diminished: Syracuse without a symphony is hard to contemplate
Symphony shutdown: Young family really wanted to stay in Syracuse
Symphony's collateral damage
it was this darkened concert hall, for the record:
April 4, 2011
the death of a symphony
last week, syracuse symphony orchestra announced that it was canceling the remainder of its 2010-2011 season performances and laying off all 60+ musicians and most of its 20 staff members, effective yesterday. this came after several months of attempting a "save the music" campaign, which they hoped would close a financial gap of about $700,000. as of the shutdown date they had raised close to $600,000.
I have so many things to say about this, but most of my thoughts are incoherent. most importantly, the news is devastating. the SSO holds a very special place in my heart. in college, student rush tickets cost us $5. I went to easily half of the concerts in any given season. my friend tami and I felt like their biggest fans. we knew all the musicians by sight, including the section string musicians. we joked about how we wished there were trading cards we could buy. we were desperate to be better performers; we would leave and half-jokingly exclaim, "we're running out of time!!" as in, we're running out of time to get better, to practice, to make something of ourselves. very often we would go straight over to crouse college, the music building, and lock ourselves in practice rooms.
it's devastating, also, because I know many of the musicians personally. they were my teachers in college. in some cases, they were my friends. the librarian there, also a violist, is a colleague of mine. now all those people are out of their jobs, at least for the remainder of the season, if not forever.
I don't know what happened in the SSO to get to this place. management has been in negotiation with the musicians for months, but up until very recently those talks seemed like they were pretty successful; the musicians had agreed to a number of concessions, including a pay cut and a decrease in the number of full-time contracted players. the media reports that the cuts added up to about $700,000. yet somehow those concessions weren't enough. management came back and requested further cuts, and now they're blaming the SSO's fate on the failure of the musicians to accept the newest proposal, coupled with poor fundraising this season.
I don't care to get into the business of accusation, although I do think it's notable that in this case the musicians understood that they needed to make sacrifices and seemed to do so willingly in order to save the organization. I don't know what's happening in the books that made those sacrifices so inconsequential. I'm sure in the next few weeks a lot more information will come to light.
but there is something really important happening in this discussion. I'm sickened by it. I'm absolutely disgusted. it's this:
SSO board votes to suspend operations; season canceled, no refunds planned
April 02, 2011 at 9:39PM
solverx wrote:
c-ya!
April 03, 2011 at 7:42AM
bored329 wrote:
Taps" is a famous musical piece, sounded by the U.S. military nightly to indicate that it is "lights out".
Bye Bye
April 02, 2011 at 11:01PM
Slingblade wrote:
Bye Bye !! Get more funding from the limousine libs that listen to it
March 29, 2011 at 11:00PM
59 Bluesman wrote:
As I said before, who the hell decided that "classical" music was the only music anyone should hear? Who said it was better than rock, jazz, country or blues??? There is your elitist attitude. We don't "deserve" to listen to the SSO??? YEEE HAAAA!!!! Why should anyone that doesn't care about it have to pay for it??? SSO, go fund yourself!
April 04, 2011 at 6:17PM
Upstate_guy
time to give it up the FAT Lady has sung.
Bye bye.
March 30, 2011 at 1:24PM
acuser wrote:
Hey SSO, thanks from stealing from the people you so desperately begged for loose change. Time to find real jobs like the rest of us, band camp can only go on for so long.
March 29, 2011 at 9:46PM
2muchtax wrote:
SAD but it's all about the money - no union concessions. Maybe they should form a volunteer SSO and play for the gate or pass the hat since they want us all to have culture. No refunds - sounds like a last minute hit and run - maybe the State Atty General will investigate refunds. The eulogy reads "The Fat lady has Sung"?
.
I'm sorry I'm going on and on with these, but I can't help it. there are currently 279 comments on that article and I've read every single one of them. I want to tell myself that people who comment anonymously on the internet are pretty universally assholes, but in this case I know better. the majority of the comments on this story read like the ones above. people are fucking RELISHING the collapse of their wonderful arts organization. why? because of attitudes like this:
March 31, 2011 at 10:56AM
tonyb wrote:
Give it a rest. They can't support themselves because there aren't enough snooty people left to dress up in their finery and show themselves off. The rest of us don't want to pay for your overpriced toy. If you want to listen to classical music buy your self some CDs and sit down and listen to them, but please sit down and shut up give everyone else a break.
I read every single comment partially because I couldn't stop; it was like picking a scab. but I also did it because it feels important for me to understand this mentality. these beliefs are the enemy of organizations like the SSO -- and like mine. and they are everywhere. they permeate everything, particularly our politics. and it's a belief system that's self-sustaining. it goes something like this: intellectualism = elitism = you think you're better than me = bad. it's attitudes like this that are responsible for the loss of arts programs in schools, and the closure of libraries, and the collapse of orchestras like the syracuse symphony and baltimore opera. and without exposure to those libraries and music classes and arts institutions, young people don't experience what those institutions offer, don't understand them, and don't appreciate them later in life. they don't see the merits of those institutions, and so those institutions don't get funded.
I am struggling so hard to write about this. like I said before, my thoughts on this are really incoherent right now, and colored by emotion. after all, this is also what I do. there but for the grace of god goes my job. and these are people I love.
I get so mad I find myself near tears. the idea that people think these musicians are snooty and elitist, the idea that the symphony is like an overpriced toy; the forgotten reality that there are over eighty people losing their goddamned JOBS. there's this infuriating notion -- one I encounter a lot -- that if you love your job then you should be happy making less money, because after all that's so important! that's worth more than money, right?
I'd like to clue those people into something: Safeway doesn't take warm fuzzies as payment for your fucking groceries.
I have so much else to say on the subject but I just cannot. get. past. stuff. like. this.
March 29, 2011 at 11:13PM
tonyb wrote:
At least there will be one less group looking for taxpayer handouts and that is good. Did the country already kick in their part? The "no refunds" is the last "screw you" message from this arrogant group. Bye, bye. Don't get your tux tail or fur coat get caught in the door on your way out.
so thank the lord for people like this--
March 29, 2011 at 11:20PM
whatevernoway wrote:
Yeah I'm sure the $0.50 a year per citizen, or whatever it would have taken, that we won't have to spend collectively to fund a priceless cultural institution will do all us a great good during the recession. I would have driven out to give you two quarters to listen to a single concerto.
March 30, 2011 at 9:45PM
KJM2000 wrote:
You have just showed everyone more than you can possibly understand about yourself. How many hours a day do you practice after you come home from your "real job"? I'm sorry for you if you can't appreciate a symphony, but if you can't take time to enjoy it, why do you take time to put it down? They didn't "steal" from anyone. Remember those bailouts and bonuses in what was it...2008? Those are people with "real jobs" stealing. These ARE people with real jobs who work harder than you can imagine. Whatever your "real job" is, no one would care one bit if you were laid off, and I'm sure whatever you work on can be funded by something else. If whoever hired you went under, you wouldn't say the salary they paid you so far was "stealing" because you didn't continue your job without pay. I feel sorry for you that you can't appreciate art, I know you won't care one bit about that, and I'm sorry that, from the way you commented, you don't think you should be able to enjoy a "real job" as you seem to think that an orchestra musician's life is fun and games of "band camp". However, I can say that there is a good chance that I don't care one bit about the things you enjoy as we seem to be very different (what do you enjoy? Sports? Cars? are you a "music lover" of pop?) and, not that this would ever happen, if those things needed funding to stay afloat and were resorting to fundraisers and drives, I probably wouldn't help them. However I would at least have the common respect to understand that there are those who do enjoy them and because of that, their jobs are indeed "real jobs", even those of the football players you probably love to watch. I don't say that they are "stealing". Someday I hope you borrow money from a good friend and just don't have means to return it. If that friend is anything like you, you'll have lost a friend, and from what I can tell I fell even sorrier that you probably won't care.
March 30, 2011 at 6:42AM
cusegrad00 wrote:
They did give concessions and offered more. I think you were the one who said something about the blood content of stones. I love the thoughts of folks on here who think they should just play because they love music. They do love music; but love doesn't pay the bills. They are highly trained and skilled workers. Obviously right now, the support is not there. They should not be expected to support their family on puppy dogs and moonbeams. Anyone who ever dedicated to their life mastering a craft should at least be empathetic to their stance.
I have so many more things to say but my head is a jumble. let me just say this: last year, companies like GE and Bank of America managed to cook their books in such a way as to avoid paying US taxes altogether. The tax bill that Bank of America deferred is estimated at 1.9 billion dollars. The money from just that one year of taxes would fund my beloved opera company at their current yearly operating budget for 254 years.
I have so many things to say about this, but most of my thoughts are incoherent. most importantly, the news is devastating. the SSO holds a very special place in my heart. in college, student rush tickets cost us $5. I went to easily half of the concerts in any given season. my friend tami and I felt like their biggest fans. we knew all the musicians by sight, including the section string musicians. we joked about how we wished there were trading cards we could buy. we were desperate to be better performers; we would leave and half-jokingly exclaim, "we're running out of time!!" as in, we're running out of time to get better, to practice, to make something of ourselves. very often we would go straight over to crouse college, the music building, and lock ourselves in practice rooms.
it's devastating, also, because I know many of the musicians personally. they were my teachers in college. in some cases, they were my friends. the librarian there, also a violist, is a colleague of mine. now all those people are out of their jobs, at least for the remainder of the season, if not forever.
I don't know what happened in the SSO to get to this place. management has been in negotiation with the musicians for months, but up until very recently those talks seemed like they were pretty successful; the musicians had agreed to a number of concessions, including a pay cut and a decrease in the number of full-time contracted players. the media reports that the cuts added up to about $700,000. yet somehow those concessions weren't enough. management came back and requested further cuts, and now they're blaming the SSO's fate on the failure of the musicians to accept the newest proposal, coupled with poor fundraising this season.
I don't care to get into the business of accusation, although I do think it's notable that in this case the musicians understood that they needed to make sacrifices and seemed to do so willingly in order to save the organization. I don't know what's happening in the books that made those sacrifices so inconsequential. I'm sure in the next few weeks a lot more information will come to light.
but there is something really important happening in this discussion. I'm sickened by it. I'm absolutely disgusted. it's this:
SSO board votes to suspend operations; season canceled, no refunds planned
April 02, 2011 at 9:39PM
solverx wrote:
c-ya!
April 03, 2011 at 7:42AM
bored329 wrote:
Taps" is a famous musical piece, sounded by the U.S. military nightly to indicate that it is "lights out".
Bye Bye
April 02, 2011 at 11:01PM
Slingblade wrote:
Bye Bye !! Get more funding from the limousine libs that listen to it
March 29, 2011 at 11:00PM
59 Bluesman wrote:
As I said before, who the hell decided that "classical" music was the only music anyone should hear? Who said it was better than rock, jazz, country or blues??? There is your elitist attitude. We don't "deserve" to listen to the SSO??? YEEE HAAAA!!!! Why should anyone that doesn't care about it have to pay for it??? SSO, go fund yourself!
April 04, 2011 at 6:17PM
Upstate_guy
time to give it up the FAT Lady has sung.
Bye bye.
March 30, 2011 at 1:24PM
acuser wrote:
Hey SSO, thanks from stealing from the people you so desperately begged for loose change. Time to find real jobs like the rest of us, band camp can only go on for so long.
March 29, 2011 at 9:46PM
2muchtax wrote:
SAD but it's all about the money - no union concessions. Maybe they should form a volunteer SSO and play for the gate or pass the hat since they want us all to have culture. No refunds - sounds like a last minute hit and run - maybe the State Atty General will investigate refunds. The eulogy reads "The Fat lady has Sung"?
.
I'm sorry I'm going on and on with these, but I can't help it. there are currently 279 comments on that article and I've read every single one of them. I want to tell myself that people who comment anonymously on the internet are pretty universally assholes, but in this case I know better. the majority of the comments on this story read like the ones above. people are fucking RELISHING the collapse of their wonderful arts organization. why? because of attitudes like this:
March 31, 2011 at 10:56AM
tonyb wrote:
Give it a rest. They can't support themselves because there aren't enough snooty people left to dress up in their finery and show themselves off. The rest of us don't want to pay for your overpriced toy. If you want to listen to classical music buy your self some CDs and sit down and listen to them, but please sit down and shut up give everyone else a break.
I read every single comment partially because I couldn't stop; it was like picking a scab. but I also did it because it feels important for me to understand this mentality. these beliefs are the enemy of organizations like the SSO -- and like mine. and they are everywhere. they permeate everything, particularly our politics. and it's a belief system that's self-sustaining. it goes something like this: intellectualism = elitism = you think you're better than me = bad. it's attitudes like this that are responsible for the loss of arts programs in schools, and the closure of libraries, and the collapse of orchestras like the syracuse symphony and baltimore opera. and without exposure to those libraries and music classes and arts institutions, young people don't experience what those institutions offer, don't understand them, and don't appreciate them later in life. they don't see the merits of those institutions, and so those institutions don't get funded.
I am struggling so hard to write about this. like I said before, my thoughts on this are really incoherent right now, and colored by emotion. after all, this is also what I do. there but for the grace of god goes my job. and these are people I love.
I get so mad I find myself near tears. the idea that people think these musicians are snooty and elitist, the idea that the symphony is like an overpriced toy; the forgotten reality that there are over eighty people losing their goddamned JOBS. there's this infuriating notion -- one I encounter a lot -- that if you love your job then you should be happy making less money, because after all that's so important! that's worth more than money, right?
I'd like to clue those people into something: Safeway doesn't take warm fuzzies as payment for your fucking groceries.
I have so much else to say on the subject but I just cannot. get. past. stuff. like. this.
March 29, 2011 at 11:13PM
tonyb wrote:
At least there will be one less group looking for taxpayer handouts and that is good. Did the country already kick in their part? The "no refunds" is the last "screw you" message from this arrogant group. Bye, bye. Don't get your tux tail or fur coat get caught in the door on your way out.
so thank the lord for people like this--
March 29, 2011 at 11:20PM
whatevernoway wrote:
Yeah I'm sure the $0.50 a year per citizen, or whatever it would have taken, that we won't have to spend collectively to fund a priceless cultural institution will do all us a great good during the recession. I would have driven out to give you two quarters to listen to a single concerto.
March 30, 2011 at 9:45PM
KJM2000 wrote:
You have just showed everyone more than you can possibly understand about yourself. How many hours a day do you practice after you come home from your "real job"? I'm sorry for you if you can't appreciate a symphony, but if you can't take time to enjoy it, why do you take time to put it down? They didn't "steal" from anyone. Remember those bailouts and bonuses in what was it...2008? Those are people with "real jobs" stealing. These ARE people with real jobs who work harder than you can imagine. Whatever your "real job" is, no one would care one bit if you were laid off, and I'm sure whatever you work on can be funded by something else. If whoever hired you went under, you wouldn't say the salary they paid you so far was "stealing" because you didn't continue your job without pay. I feel sorry for you that you can't appreciate art, I know you won't care one bit about that, and I'm sorry that, from the way you commented, you don't think you should be able to enjoy a "real job" as you seem to think that an orchestra musician's life is fun and games of "band camp". However, I can say that there is a good chance that I don't care one bit about the things you enjoy as we seem to be very different (what do you enjoy? Sports? Cars? are you a "music lover" of pop?) and, not that this would ever happen, if those things needed funding to stay afloat and were resorting to fundraisers and drives, I probably wouldn't help them. However I would at least have the common respect to understand that there are those who do enjoy them and because of that, their jobs are indeed "real jobs", even those of the football players you probably love to watch. I don't say that they are "stealing". Someday I hope you borrow money from a good friend and just don't have means to return it. If that friend is anything like you, you'll have lost a friend, and from what I can tell I fell even sorrier that you probably won't care.
March 30, 2011 at 6:42AM
cusegrad00 wrote:
They did give concessions and offered more. I think you were the one who said something about the blood content of stones. I love the thoughts of folks on here who think they should just play because they love music. They do love music; but love doesn't pay the bills. They are highly trained and skilled workers. Obviously right now, the support is not there. They should not be expected to support their family on puppy dogs and moonbeams. Anyone who ever dedicated to their life mastering a craft should at least be empathetic to their stance.
I have so many more things to say but my head is a jumble. let me just say this: last year, companies like GE and Bank of America managed to cook their books in such a way as to avoid paying US taxes altogether. The tax bill that Bank of America deferred is estimated at 1.9 billion dollars. The money from just that one year of taxes would fund my beloved opera company at their current yearly operating budget for 254 years.
February 25, 2011
snow day
I had been jonesing for a snow day all winter. there is nothing like it: the eager early-morning peek out the window; the hopeful phone call (or email check); the giddy exhilaration of hearing "the office is closed for the day." then you shuffle out into the living room in your pjs, create an elaborate blanket nest on the couch, make sure the cats are cuddled in, and watch vapid daytime TV for a few hours. there is coffee. sometimes, there are pancakes. total. bliss.
we don't get much snow on the valley floor, though, because we're at such a low elevation and in such a mild climate. did it snow at all in portland this winter? I don't think so. scott & I spent several weekends in the snow on mt. hood, sure, and we got some when I was back in maryland, but it's not the same.
they had been calling for this BIG STORM! all week in portland, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything because the newscasters pretty much pee themselves at the very mention of snow. portlanders, likely conditioned by the same news anchors, had by wednesday totally cleaned out my local grocery store. but by mid-day on wednesday there was still no precipitation, and the forecasts were beginning to be downsized. five inches? okay, actually maybe just an inch. and not so cold. and it'll be 50 by the weekend.
*sigh*
so I'd pretty much resigned myself to a winter without snow days. I woke up yesterday morning, 5 AM or so, and there was the tiniest dusting. I was bitter! I was sad. I wanted the snow day magic and instead I was going to have to go to work. I resolved to show up to the office in my pajamas.
at 7:15, scott texted. "snow!" he said. I looked out the window. more snow than before, but still not much. the tree branches looked pretty but it didn't look promising. I pulled up my work email. as I was waiting for it, scott texted again. "portland schools closed!"
and then! oh, dear readers, those magic words: OFFICE CLOSED.
it was 7:15, so I followed standard snow day protocol: I gathered up my pillows, put on my comfiest around the house pants, and went out into the living room. I had a bowl of cereal! I turned on PBS. I crawled under the 5 fuzzy blankets on my couch. the cats couldn't believe their luck. then I fell asleep to sesame street and woke up again at 11.
it was magnificent.
by the time I got up again (to make second breakfast, obvs), the snow had melted. that felt kind of weird, like cheating. what was I supposed to do now? the road was dry; if I wanted, I could even go out. but ... it was a snow day. the whole magic of the snow day is that you're in, and everyone else is in, and you can't really get out. you're stuck! you have to loaf around because you don't have anything else to do, except maybe go outside and make snowballs. and you can't feel guilty about it.
so I decided to studiously avoid looking out the window, by doing the following:
cleaning all the dishes
putting all the dishes away
vacuuming
wearing the cat on my neck
(not my most photogenic moment but look at that cat perch! so proud)
cleaning the bathtub
making curried sweet potato soup with accompanying GOAT CHEESE BISCUITS which incidentally I have been craving all day
planning out my entire garden, which took three hours, and included finding every seed to order and drawing a detailed diagram of planting
writing some blog posts (ahem)
taking pictures of cats in boxes (part of an ongoing series)
then I finally ventured outside to do laundry. and it was SNOWING AGAIN! *rejoice*
I was finished with all my household-y things by early afternoon so I got to spend the remaining part of the day doing as the universe intended: eating soup and biscuits and watching really awesome, really bad TV.
[alicia also has a wonderful write-up (with photos that are way lovelier than mine) over at her blog. incidentally she's the one who turned me on to the soup.]
January 12, 2011
books 2011
1. betty smith: joy in the morning
2. jean thompson: who do you love
-
3. cory doctorow: down and out in the magic kingdom
4. p.g. wodehouse: my man jeeves
5. d.h. lawrence: the rainbow
6. david grann: the lost city of z
7. isaac bashevis singer: shosha
8. karen pryor: don't shoot the dog! the new art of teaching and training
9. jason tesar: the awakened: part one
10. laura whitcomb: a certain slant of light
11. thich nhat hanh: true love
12. george r.r. martin: a game of thrones: a song of ice and fire
13. mike foster: gracenomics
14. malcolm gladwell: what the dog saw, and other adventures
15. suzanne collins: the hunger games
16. suzanne collins: catching fire
17. suzanne collins: mockingjay
18. stieg larsson: the girl with the dragon tattoo
19. malcolm gladwell: blink: the power of thinking without thinking
2. jean thompson: who do you love
-
3. cory doctorow: down and out in the magic kingdom
4. p.g. wodehouse: my man jeeves
5. d.h. lawrence: the rainbow
6. david grann: the lost city of z
7. isaac bashevis singer: shosha
8. karen pryor: don't shoot the dog! the new art of teaching and training
9. jason tesar: the awakened: part one
10. laura whitcomb: a certain slant of light
11. thich nhat hanh: true love
12. george r.r. martin: a game of thrones: a song of ice and fire
13. mike foster: gracenomics
14. malcolm gladwell: what the dog saw, and other adventures
15. suzanne collins: the hunger games
16. suzanne collins: catching fire
17. suzanne collins: mockingjay
18. stieg larsson: the girl with the dragon tattoo
19. malcolm gladwell: blink: the power of thinking without thinking
December 26, 2010
the day of rest
we had a nice christmas. as usual I was awoken by my siblings at an ungodly 6:15 am, made coffee, admired the tableau of presents under the tree, opened said presents, donned all my new clothes at once (fuzzy socks, new sweater, the all-important fancy new compression running tights), and went out to play ball with our black lab, max, who gets a few new fetch toys in his stocking each year.
(the backyard)
after the morning's festivities there was french toast to make, and wrapping paper to clean up; the dining room table to set; toys to momentarily play with before company arrived. (we had particular fun with the remote control sumo wrestlers). then my aunt & uncle and cousins got here. there was eating, and more presents, and some sipping of ridiculous, insanely expensive, moderately good coffee. there was some dreamy browsing online for a pair of tall riding boots, subsidized by a christmas gift card. there were kids running around yelling excitedly.
there were, as always, chickens.
(chuck, charlotte, & peepers)
the rooster, by the way, has honed his intimidating death stare.
and had not crowed much in a few weeks, but did rise to the occasion when I threatened him by wearing a puffy white coat, flapping my wings, and strutting around with my beautiful red comb:
we ate dinner at my grandmother's, fourteen of us at a table crammed so tightly into her small living room that in order to get up from our chairs, we had to climb over furniture. there was pie. and ice cream. pretty much I'll probably never eat again after the last four days.
today was much more of the same: a morning spent in blankets on the couch, then a trip to western maryland to see my aunt, uncle, and cousins, whom I was very close to as a child and whom I hadn't seen in a year. we watched football, ate too much lasagna, and probably scared my cousin's new girlfriend. the next generation, ages 2 to 13, ran through the house with various toys. this is the holiday for me: messy and loud, with too much eating; lots of reminiscing, teasing each other about stories from our past. we have an ever increasing number of small children in the house, and the kids' table, once ours, gets filled with other faces. there's a lot of coffee, and everyone's tired, and on lucky years, it's snowing just enough to be pretty but not enough to be meddlesome. by the end, you're overstuffed and you've laughed too hard and you probably need a nap.
yesterday -- christmas day -- was day 101. I ran a mile and a half in my new tights. today is my first day off since september 15. if I really wanted, I still have 40 minutes to get in a run, but I'm forcing myself to stop. this, then, is where the streak ends. and I am sad. tomorrow once again is day one.
merry christmas, everyone.
(the backyard)
after the morning's festivities there was french toast to make, and wrapping paper to clean up; the dining room table to set; toys to momentarily play with before company arrived. (we had particular fun with the remote control sumo wrestlers). then my aunt & uncle and cousins got here. there was eating, and more presents, and some sipping of ridiculous, insanely expensive, moderately good coffee. there was some dreamy browsing online for a pair of tall riding boots, subsidized by a christmas gift card. there were kids running around yelling excitedly.
there were, as always, chickens.
(chuck, charlotte, & peepers)
the rooster, by the way, has honed his intimidating death stare.
and had not crowed much in a few weeks, but did rise to the occasion when I threatened him by wearing a puffy white coat, flapping my wings, and strutting around with my beautiful red comb:
we ate dinner at my grandmother's, fourteen of us at a table crammed so tightly into her small living room that in order to get up from our chairs, we had to climb over furniture. there was pie. and ice cream. pretty much I'll probably never eat again after the last four days.
today was much more of the same: a morning spent in blankets on the couch, then a trip to western maryland to see my aunt, uncle, and cousins, whom I was very close to as a child and whom I hadn't seen in a year. we watched football, ate too much lasagna, and probably scared my cousin's new girlfriend. the next generation, ages 2 to 13, ran through the house with various toys. this is the holiday for me: messy and loud, with too much eating; lots of reminiscing, teasing each other about stories from our past. we have an ever increasing number of small children in the house, and the kids' table, once ours, gets filled with other faces. there's a lot of coffee, and everyone's tired, and on lucky years, it's snowing just enough to be pretty but not enough to be meddlesome. by the end, you're overstuffed and you've laughed too hard and you probably need a nap.
yesterday -- christmas day -- was day 101. I ran a mile and a half in my new tights. today is my first day off since september 15. if I really wanted, I still have 40 minutes to get in a run, but I'm forcing myself to stop. this, then, is where the streak ends. and I am sad. tomorrow once again is day one.
merry christmas, everyone.
December 24, 2010
100.
These journeys are quiet. They mark my days with adventure
too precious for anyone else to share, little gems
of darkness, the world going by, and my breath, and the road.
-- from run before dawn, william stafford
too precious for anyone else to share, little gems
of darkness, the world going by, and my breath, and the road.
-- from run before dawn, william stafford
December 23, 2010
day 99
Our ancestors were farmers
they did their talking with their shoulder muscles
they got up at dawn and baked their brains
all day in forty-acre cornfields
they liked to listen to the singing of their bodies
blood set in motion, the hum of air
the virtues they most prized were
tenacity, endurance, raw physical energy
an unlimited capacity to absorb punishment
they could smell rain twenty miles away
they had the habit of gazing heavenward
as if what they most wanted to understand
would be coming from that direction and
what came never ceased to amaze them
-- not unlike the runner, joe david bellamy
day 99: a rough headwind, a distilled sunny sky, two dead deer on the side of the road. a stomachache. this penultimate day is bittersweet.
December 9, 2010
two years, penniless
I bought Cookie two years ago today. Unlike last year, I can't say we've been on TV or we've improved our collection; in fact, in my lesson last night, my instructor said, "Wow, I can't believe it's been two years," and I replied, "Me neither. I kind of thought we'd be better than this?"
We had a rough ride on Saturday, which was very blustery here in Portland. Horses don't like wind, because they're prey animals who rely on their sense of hearing, which wind distorts. In the absence of that sense, they rely on each other, which on Saturday meant that every time one horse spooked, everybody spooked! Good times. And since I ride #1 Spook Master, I was often the accelerant to disaster. Every time we reached the far end of the arena (which overlooks the front field of the property), either my mare or the other mare in the arena would jump 4 feet toward the inside of the arena. The other mare was slower about it and more prone to simply balking. Cookie prefers what I like to call the "Arab teleport" method. Arabians seem singularly able to travel faster than the speed of light at times of even minor distress. Keeping the horse between you and the ground can prove ... challenging. In a fit of impatience I grew tired of shying predictably in the same place and made her stand still in that place, resolving to let her move from it only when she'd relaxed. So what did she do? She stood stock still at high alert for about 45 seconds before jumping off all four feet, scaring all four horses in the arena, and causing one seven-year-old girl to fall off her horse.
Classy.
(The little girl is fine, and bravely got right back on).
Last night in my lesson Cookie had her danger ears back on, but to her credit she trusted me enough to put a lid on the spooking, and she was actually a very nice ride (although she was constantly dipping her inside shoulder, wanting to avoid the scary dark world outside the rail, and I was constantly having to hold her up/boot her back to the outside of the ring). It's exhausting to have a horse constantly on edge, but it does make for a nicer ride than she is on the days she's lazy. At least I don't have to work so hard.
Things I have taught her:
- to pick up her feet on verbal command ("foot") and likewise to hold them until I say "down"
- to stand still while mounting. finally. almost.
- peppermints = good
- how to recognize the peppermint wrapper sound
- to never ever ever be in my way while I'm cleaning her stall
- likewise to never ever ever be in my space. ever. unless invited. (pushy horses are a big pet peeve of mine)
- the verbal cue "blanket," which I say just before sticking her turnout blanket over her head. (she stops what she's doing and drops/raises her head)
Things she has taught me:
- how to sit a buck
- how it's important to have the courage to get on and stay on even on scary days
- how to ride the Arab teleport
- how to sit the world's bounciest trot
- what being a proud mama feels like. she's so pretty that I always get compliments from strangers, at home or away. just Saturday, the mom of a little girl taking lessons came over to say, "that is a very beautiful horse."
I got a big kick out of looking at her sale ad earlier today, which I saved to my computer after I bought her. Under "Activities" she's listed as "Show/Trail/Cow Horse." Cow horse! Hilarious. She probably is, but she hasn't had a Western saddle on her back since the day I bought her. Maybe some day.
what I'd like to do with her, someday:
- jump real fences
- take a dressage test
- teach her to smile (working on it)
- ride an endurance race
- hack out on more trails
- gallop
- go on a hunt (this is my lifetime bucket list goal)
so! here's to one more year of not falling off my horse.
November 2, 2010
more miscellany
things you don't often hear fron conductors
"I don't know what that instrument is, but could you play it louder?"
what all that kale looked like
(click through for notes)
for reference, those are full-size bell peppers; I had to stand on a chair to get the full shot.
more things the cats have destroyed
makeup brushes, which were somehow extracted from my zipped makeup bag and thereupon drooled all over
about 30 q-tips, pulled from a not-quite-closed bathroom drawer, drooled upon, and scattered throughout the bathroom and hallway
cotton balls, likewise
bathroom rug, repeatedly
bathroom towels, not destroyed but climbed upon and coated in cat hair
my sanity, increasingly
what I'm yearning for lately
another thanksgiving furlough
how I only partially missed halloween
I didn't dress up this year -- until the last minute, I thought I'd be working all three nights of halloween weekend -- but a certain someone and I did at least pick and carve pumpkins. I think I like his better. it's sly. plus, the face of mine (on the left) is very obviously rotting at the bottom. we can't all be beautiful all the time, I suppose.
"I don't know what that instrument is, but could you play it louder?"
what all that kale looked like
(click through for notes)
for reference, those are full-size bell peppers; I had to stand on a chair to get the full shot.
more things the cats have destroyed
makeup brushes, which were somehow extracted from my zipped makeup bag and thereupon drooled all over
about 30 q-tips, pulled from a not-quite-closed bathroom drawer, drooled upon, and scattered throughout the bathroom and hallway
cotton balls, likewise
bathroom rug, repeatedly
bathroom towels, not destroyed but climbed upon and coated in cat hair
my sanity, increasingly
what I'm yearning for lately
another thanksgiving furlough
how I only partially missed halloween
I didn't dress up this year -- until the last minute, I thought I'd be working all three nights of halloween weekend -- but a certain someone and I did at least pick and carve pumpkins. I think I like his better. it's sly. plus, the face of mine (on the left) is very obviously rotting at the bottom. we can't all be beautiful all the time, I suppose.
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