March 8, 2009


yesterday: I got to the barn early so that I could turn Cookie loose in the arena and let her run around for awhile, get rid of pent up energy. but when I got there, one of the half-leasers was already there, tacked up, and riding. (It was 9 AM). because I couldn't exercise her in the arena without other riders there, I opted not to have my lesson. this is my biggest flaw as a rider, and it's also my barn's biggest flaw. mine: that I don't have the confidence to lunge my horse while there are other riders in the arena, because sometimes Cookie gets it into her brain to momentarily bolt on the line and I am afraid I can't hold her. my barn's: there is no turnout, so the horses are stall-bound and pent-up. if I rode every day she would be better, but these days that's impossible. in the end I finished my stalls, watered, and went home to get out of the cold & damp.

last night: in rehearsal one of the theorbos exploded. maybe because of the climate in the theater (or maybe not), the face popped right off, turning the instrument into a mess of string and wood. I was in the production office at the time -- not in the theater -- and so I neither saw nor heard it.

today: I opened the envelope my ex-boyfriend sent to me this week (I got it in the mail yesterday but I was already cranky enough) and discovered, along with the video game I was expecting (one of mine he'd borrowed ages ago) an envelope full of symphony tickets for the rest of the season. "I haven't been able to bring myself to go to any this season," he wrote on the flap. he wrote me an email last week that I have still not responded to.

now: shower, rehearsal, library, haircut, rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal. at least I finally did my dishes.

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