January 10, 2009

january 10.

things that are good:

unclipping the lead line from your horse's halter and having her follow you around anyway, without ropes or tricks, stopping when you stop and walking when you walk; her hair all over your gloves; her muzzle snuffling the top of your head. a surprise message from an old high school friend, a guy you used to tease about being so skinny, except now he's tall and lanky and rides a motorcycle, and he wants to come and see you and catch up. he really means it, and you know it, and it is a tiny offering that someone who lived your history still finds you fascinating and compelling.

this is a day that is nothing in particular, and I am tired, because I didn't get home until 4 this morning from a party thrown for a dear, close, and yet relatively new friend. this day did not hold a giant miracle, or a great awakening; just a small crysallis opening, just a moment of satisfaction. depression is something that you crawl out of so slowly that sometimes it feels like you'll be stuck forever. each step is so tiny. but precious.

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